"Meet 'n Fuck: Office Romance": A Capitalist Allegory

 I wrote this shitpost on FFR back in 2017. Reposting it here for posterity:

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From the creators of cult classics Big Top Bangeroo and Velma Gets Spooked:

Meet 'n Fuck Office Romance
Creator: VadimGoD (newgrounds.com)

Overview

Our hero, Phillip, works at a company with a hot boss, Ms. Pumpkins (yes, really). He jerks it to her in his cubicle everyday.

One day she calls him to her office. "Am I fired?" he asks. "No," she replies. "I need you to run an errand for me. In the library."

Not wanting to lose his job, Phillip goes to the library to find the requested documentation.

"Were you looking for this?" a voice calls to him from behind.

It's Ms. Pumpkins.

"I noticed you staring at my massive tits in the office just now. Do you wanna feel them?"

Thus begins the timeless story of a man and a woman fighting against all odds to find true love............
(they fuck a lot and then it ends)

Random Thoughts

Art

So the first thing you need to know about this game is that the art is directly stolen from an actual eroge, Empress's Cleavage. It is just shittily animated (read: tweened) to give the illusion of fucking.

With that aside, the art is actually rather nice.

Game Design

The game is unisequential, meaning that there is only one path from start to finish, excluding the path where you close the game, delete your browser history, and throw your computer in a dumpster fire.

There are two forms of interaction:
1) Choosing dialogue from a list of choices, and
2) Fondling Ms. Pumpkins during the sex scenes.

If you select the wrong dialogue option, you are given more chances to try again until you get it right. (i.e. you are unable to deviate from the "true" path defined by the developer(s))

Sound

There are three songs, and a fuckton of moaning sound effects. That's it.

Capitalist Allegory

Meet n' Fuck: Office Romance clearly adopts an anti-capitalist stance. Specifically, it draws on themes described by Marxist communism.

These themes are the following:

1) The lack of social mobility for the proletariat,
2) The dependence of the proletariat on the bourgeoisie, and
3) The lack of agency of the proletariat.

Let us revisit the actors of our tale:

*Phillip, the hard working, yet naive, proletariat, employed by:
*Ms. Pumpkins, the exploitative and arrogant bourgeoisie.

Let us now walk through the story through the lens of Marxist theory.

The story begins with Phillip in his office. We can tell by his surroundings that he is a hard worker -- he's been long-employed and is a trusted member of the community of the office. But he is still a slave to the computer.

He daydreams of fucking Ms. Pumpkins while sucking on her titties. There are a few interpretations of this scenario we may make right off the bat:

*Phillip desires revolution, a shift in the power dynamic between the two of them,
*Phillip desires the means of production (Ms. Pumpkins's titties), or
*Phillip seeks personal revenge against Ms. Pumpkins (fucking, in this sense, is an act of desecration against the temple of Ms. Pumpkins's body)

What is common across all three of these is the desire for power. Phillip, in his current state, possesses no power over his life's situation. He either works, or he dies. Furthermore, he possesses only his ability to work for the establishment.

But he dreams.
He dreams of the titties.

At this point, Phillip is called into Ms. Pumpkins's office for an errand. This is a mundane scenario. Ms. Pumpkins has a desire, and Phillip fulfills that desire.

Our first reaction to Phillip receiving sexual satisfaction for his work is, "congrats, buddy, you broke through your class designation." But according to VadimGoD, this is folly. We will need to examine the sex scenes specifically to tease out the truth from the illusion.

The first true sex scene of the game is a handjob. Specifically, it is a handjob with him facing away from her ---- a reacharound. This demonstrates a clear power dynamic between the two of them.

Ms. Pumpkins is in control. She is always in control.

Phillip cannot even watch her jerk him off. All he can do is stand and feel it.

The following scene is one in which he fondles her from behind. This is progress, isn't it? Phillip literally seizes the means of production (her titties) for himself.

-----But alas, he is only following her direct instruction.

"I want you to grab my tits."

This makes clear that Phillip is not actually in possession of the means of production. The bourgeoisie is simply allowing him access to it. The titties are hers, even if he's allowed to grope them.

This becomes even more apparent in the following scene, wherein Phillip literally sucks on her tits while she holds his head.

Phillip cannot have tits of his own -- he must suck on hers.

This brilliantly draws upon the Western symbolism of breastfeeding: the mother grants breastmilk, life (in this case, the means of production), to a weak, dependent child.

Phillip is given a brief respite by being allowed to titfuck the means of production, but this is only momentary --- in a matter of seconds, Ms. Pumpkins is in control again. This brief concession of agency is simply a way to keep Phillip running in the hamster wheel. He has tasted success, but she knows that he can never attain it.

"I want you to touch me."

At this point, the user is allowed to fondle any part of Ms. Pumpkins's body to get her hot. Again, Phillip has no real agency here:

1) He is following her direct command, even if doing so slightly benefits him, and
2) The user is required to touch her private parts in a specific order, meaning that this segment is unisequential -> there is no dramatic agency possessed by the player. (That is, you must touch her left tit before her right tit, and only then can you rub her clit.)

From this point on, it's the same story ---- Ms. Pumpkin scripts all of the interactions between her and Phillip. Phillip may only join along for the ride. He never acts upon her. She always acts upon him.

At the end of the story, Phillip reportedly receives a promotion and a pay raise, but his fundamental situation does not change. He is still subservient to Ms. Pumpkins. Presumably forever.

-----Could this outcome have been avoided?

No. Remember, there are plenty of choices presented to the user, but only one of them may actually advance the timeline. That is to say, capitalism (specifically, the American Dream) is attractive because it promises power to those who work hard and make good choices, but in reality, we are all mostly stuck in our own sociopolitical stratum. The choices do not matter.

Phillip will always be the proletariat.
Ms. Pumpkins will always be the bourgeoisie.

Phillip leaves the sexual encounter feeling like he has accomplished something, but he has not. He was being exploited by the bourgeoisie. She used sex to maintain her position of power over him. She used sex to distract him from his dreams of revolution.

This is not true progress.

We can only hope that Phillip realizes his position and revolts against the ruling class. This is a tale for another day, though.

-----Good luck, Phillip. May you someday seize the titty for yourself.

Verdict

Move over, Moby Dick, this is the new allegory to rule them all.

Pants-on rating: Plagiarism/10
Pants-off rating: 3/10

Ciconia Analysis Masterpost, Part 1: John of Patmos

Preface

I've been stewing over how to interpret the multiple layers of Ciconia no Naku Koro ni (and, even worse, how to unify them cohesively) so I've spent a few days rereading a bunch of passages and saving screenshots... and engaging in a few dozen hours traversing the internet along topics of religious history, Hellenistic astrology, and anthropology. (The difficulty warning wasn't lying!!) I wasn't sure how to organize this analysis so I'm just gonna start with what makes the most sense. It's gonna be a little disorganized so sorry in advance!!

Blue text will signify strong hypotheses of mine, red text will signify facts: either unambiguous narrative disclosures or real-world cultural knowledge.

This analysis will have to span multiple parts since there's so much to go over. Feel free to leave a comment or ping me on Twitter (@dabackpack) with feedback! Let's get started.

Data Fragment 29: The Revelation of Saint Ioannis 

A lot of the dialogue here is on-the-nose but there are a few points of interest that unravel a lot of the deep mysteries of Phase 1.

First of all, "Saint Ioannis" is a transliteration of the Hebrew "Saint John" (similar to how "Jehovah" would be written akin to "Iehova"). "Saint John" is an important recurrent figure (more precisely, "set of figures") in the New Testament. The most prominent mention of a "Saint John" refers to Saint John the Apostle, one of Jesus's Twelve Apostles. This Saint John was for a long time considered to be a single person, despite being referenced in historically disparate passages from the New Testament. We generally understand that John the Apostle, John the Evangelist, and John the Elder are indeed different people with the same Christian name. (Interestingly, many religious denominations still assert that these Johns are indeed the same person -- a subject that doesn't really matter in this discussion, since we're only concerned with one of these Johns.)

The "Saint Ioannis" from this Data Fragment is referring to John of Patmos: the author of Revelation, the final canonical book in the New Testament... also known as the Apocalypse of John. Reading and making analogy to Revelation is crucial to understanding some of Ciconia's more nuanced points.

Revelation begins with John of Patmos receiving a message from God: he begins receiving prophetic visions and is instructed to record them, for they describe apocalyptic events culminating in the Second Coming of Jesus Christ. John receives divine wisdom in the form of these visions and is tasked with producing and disseminating this knowledge to the Seven Churches of Asia... now where have we heard this before?

34 transcribing the prophecies from God

That's right, Miss Vier Dreissig is the prophet John in this retelling of Revelation. Just as John sequestered himself in a hut on the island Patmos, Vier lives in her own enclave underground where she performs her God-given task with incredible singularity. (With this in mind, I will be referring to the underground research facility as Patmos from now on.) 

There are a number of her "translations" that have direct analogues to devices in the Book of Revelation, but let us return to the Data Fragment for a moment. Seshat and Toujirou discuss the recently-discovered Christian canon, revealing an alarming truth about the Ciconia world: 

The real-life Christian canon identifies 27 books as canon, with Revelation being the last! The Council of Carthage, c. 397, explicitly names Revelation as canonical, and yet Seshat admits that this very same council only admitted 26 books into canon. 

What does this mean? An entire book seems to be... completely erased from cultural history. This should also ring some bells when you consider that, in this Data Fragment, Seshat and Toujirou come to realize that this secret book is actually a "prophecy" of its own -- an outline of the extinction of mankind. This leads me to a central element of the Ciconia universe:

The Book of Revelation was instrumental in the events leading to WW3, and was thus completely censored from history. Its existence, as well as its canonical status, was wiped away at the start of the A3W world. This is because the book provided an outline for the catastrophes that led to humanity's annihilation. 

But we're not done yet--

Data Fragment 29 exists AFTER WW3, and this prophecy outlines the extinction of mankind with WW4, indicating that the A3W actually loops and resets! "WW3" and "WW4" are essentially the same: just iterations of mankind's near-extinction following a singular prophecy. This is the time-loop element of Ciconia. 

We really don't even know how many loops have already occurred so far. The existence of "blue Miyao" (who I'll be nicknaming Bern-Miyao) might give some insight here: 

Bern-Miyao is the accumulated experiences of Miyao through multiple iterations of A3W, completely analogous to Frederika Bernkastel from Higurashi. Every iteration, "Miyao" and "Meow" are reset, and Bern-Miyao is the only persistent memory that Miyao is allowed to keep with him every iteration. 

I'm inclined to believe that Bern-Miyao is "superficially correct": Miyao is absolutely instrumental in the enactment of the Apocalypse, but I also think it's possible for Miyao to STOP the Apocalypse without having to kill himself. More on this in another post, I think. 

More about Ciconia's Revelation

There are at least two main clues about Vier's role in enacting the Book of Revelation. The most obvious of these is the earthquake that Mario of Patmos starts with his "wisdom." This earthquake is an extraordinary event for A3W and essentially heralds in the End of the World. This mirrors a passage from Revelation, once the Sixth of Seven Seals is opened: 

1. There occurs a great earthquake where "the sun becomes black as sackcloth of hair, and the moon like blood" (6:12).

The Black Sun and Blood Moon are directly observable in a few of the background CGs... but also: 

Toujirou not being very subtle

This exchange between Seshat and Toujirou is extremely revealing (for another post) but just note the repeated illusions to the "sun dying out." In Toujirou's mind, the Black Sun of Revelation isn't the end of mankind's development, and he's hopeful that eventually we can achieve peace even if the world has to end a few times before that happens.

Here's another image I'm gonna sneak in here because I don't really know where to put it: 

"What the heck is this thing?" you might have asked. This is an astrolabe, a tool used for both astronomy and astrology, not a clock. Yeah, astrology is a pretty big motif in Ciconia too. There's a lot of astrological minutiae that actually seem important, but that'll have to be... for another post. Today I'll just be pointing out a few important elements of this progress screen. 

Once the "clock" strikes midnight, the world-ending earthquake happens. Note the red-colored moon at the 12:00 position: this corresponds temporally with the opening of the Sixth Seal in the Book of Revelation (the "Blood Moon") from above. 

With the astrolabe clock revealing exactly when the Blood Moon occurs, we now have a relative timeline for the Apocalypse in Ciconia. The ticking of the astrolabe as a whole represents progress towards the End of the World. The part of the astrolabe that's "white" is the scope of Phase 1 (that is, the beginning of the game is the 7:30 position or so). The remainder of the astrolabe is the precursor to what we've witnessed. 

But the thing with clocks is that they cycle. One complete 12-hour cycle through the astrolabe is one COMPLETE iteration of the A3W world. After Apocalypse happens (i.e. the Second Coming of Christ occurs) the world resets and the cycle repeats. 

(The astrolabe isn't just a clock though!! Those lines extending out of it, with the gibberish text, correspond to the markings of a Babylonian Natal astrology chart! It's way too much to explain, especially since I can't parse what the gibberish is supposed to mean, but the astrolabe is slightly reminiscent to the Natal chart representing the Star of Bethlehem as observed by the Magi before the Nativity:)

c. March 2nd, 5 B.C., believed to show the Star of Bethlehem during Christ's birth

 More on that later... maybe... astrology is hard. I don't think this Natal chart is the right one, but serves as an example of what one looks like for you to compare it with the markings on the astrolabe. Anyway-----

What is the Second Coming of Christ? It's the event in Revelation that succeeds every other: the climax of the story. Those that passed Judgment, the chosen people, are revived and get to live with God for the next 1000 years in New Jerusalem--- wait, 1000 years? Yeah we're not done with Vier yet. 

The 1000-Year Time-Capsule 

This is the second hint that Vier gives us. Some more Revelations quotes: 

He seized the dragon, that ancient serpent, who is the Devil and Satan, and bound him for a thousand years and threw him into the pit and locked and sealed it over him, so that he would deceive the nations no more, until the thousand years were ended. After that, he must be let out for a little while. (20:2-3)

[The rest] came to life and reigned with Christ a thousand years. (The rest of the dead did not come to life until the thousand years were ended.) This is the first resurrection. Blessed and holy are those who share in the first resurrection. Over these the second death has no power, but they will be priests of God and of Christ, and they will reign with him a thousand years (20:4-6)

This 1000-year motif tells us about how the time loop actually HAPPENS. Satan gets trapped and the human survivors get to party it up with God in the World to Come. The description of the horrifying pit in the underground lab closely mirrors the description of the ultimate destination of Satan in the Book of Revelation. 

This begs the question: in Phase 1, who is "righteous" and who is "sinful"? Who goes to New Jerusalem and who has to stick in the time-capsule and wait in Hell?

I'll have to go more into detail on this later since there's a lot to talk about, but here's a sneak-peek:

 Everyone who gets killed goes to Heaven, which I think is complete virtualization in the Selcom internet. "Angel" Jayden, in the last scene of Phase 1, asks Miyao to come with him to Heaven: "isn't this what you wanted?" (Referring to Miyao's final laments about being tethered to his fleshy body)

Mitake Miyao (chooses to? or otherwise) gets sent to Hell -- the 1000-Year Time-Capsule -- and gets to experience the entirety of the A3W time-loop again in Phase 2.  

Miyao's function in Ciconia probably deserves its own post, but it essentially boils down to:

Miyao/Meow/Bern-Miyao are the Antichrist, the Whore of Babylon, and the False Prophet and collectively represent "Satan." However, these three are purged from the body at the end of Phase 1... and at the very least Bern-Miyao goes into the Time-Capsule. The "murderous kill-program" that Bern-Miyao warns of rises and takes over the body, killing Jayden and Koshka (off-screen). This "killing program" is the stand-in for Jesus Christ himself, and after "Mitake Miyao" gets sent into the 1000-Year Time-Capsule, the "killing program" completes the Last Judgment of the Book of Revelation. 

So... yeah, there's a lot of stuff we need to talk about regarding Miyao. Don't worry if the last part doesn't make a lot of sense yet, there's still a lot to go over!! ...In another post. 

Some questions for later:

• How does Koshka fit into this?
• Who else goes into the Time-Capsule?
• What's up with all the Salvador Dali references?
• What is the true agenda of the Ninth Prime Chivalric Order?
• Dad?????

Some answers for later:

• AOU, COU, ABN, and ACR as the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse 
• The two LATO onee-chans as the "two witnesses" described in Revelation 
• Seshat's true form 
• The "true" function of 8MS 

Let me know your thoughts!! 

DLSite ASMR

I've been a long-time patron (10 years or thereabouts) of the English DLSite page. They sell some great doujin products (Stellavanity and Hatoful Boyfriend, for example). Additionally, there are a lot of royalty-free audio/visual assets for game creation which is always nice.

There's a summer sale so I decided to revisit it again and... yeah, it's almost entirely flooded with ASMR goods now. This isn't really a new thing -- it's been a popular trend for a few years now, but I always found it kind of weird. It's not really a problem except that I have to wade through these when looking for deals (lol).

I always wondered how an extremely niche site like DLSite (well, the English version, anyway) stayed afloat this long. I guess I have my answer.

Well, good for them, I guess.

Muv-Luv vs Otaku

so JAM Project is performing at Otakon 2017 so I'm buying a VIP pass because hell yeah

to commemorate the occasion I am going to do a tiny lil thing on one of my favorite visual novels, Muv-Luv Alternative, the third and final entry of the Muv-Luv VN series.

I've been meaning to write about how brilliant this game is at tethering the player to the protagonist so I will draft out some thoughts here because you are all a captive audience

obviously none of you have played or heard of this game so I will drop the minimum amount of context required to understand what I'm saying

Muv-Luv vs the Otaku

The Muv-Luv series is, to my knowledge, the first overtly anti-escapist mainstream visual novel ever written. To clarify what I mean by this, I will first describe the target audience for this game, draw upon a well-known anime as a point of comparison, and then describe how Muv-Luv Alternative functions in this lens.

Part 0: Context

Muv Luv is a visual novel trilogy that started in 2003 and concluded in 2006. It is comprised of three parts (obviously):
Muv Luv Extra,
Muv Luv Unlimited, and
Muv Luv Alternative.

The first game, Extra, is a generic high-school rom-com harem eroge starring resident pussy magnet Takeru Shirogane.

In Unlimited, Takeru one day wakes up to find himself in a post-apocalyptic sci-fi/military hellhole and is forced to join the United Nations to fight against an alien menace (using giant robots, of course). Ultimately, he fails to save humanity, leading us to ---

Alternative, in which Takeru is sent back to the beginning of the timeline of Unlimited, and is given a second chance to save humanity. (This is the meat of the story)

In this essay(?), I suggest how, fundamentally, Muv-Luv attacks the conventions of harem eroge and serves as a criticism of the otaku consumerbase.

Part 1: Otaku

Most of you probably are aware of what otaku culture is like, but for the rest of you, here is Google's definition:

o·ta·ku
ōˈtäko͞o/
noun 
(in Japan) a young person who is obsessed with computers or particular aspects of popular culture to the detriment of their social skills.

It should be little surprise that there are large otaku subcultures that play pornographic dating sims and watch anime. In particular, I want to draw attention to the following points:

Axiom 1:
Above all else, otaku value bitches and guns.
Axiom 2:
Otaku fucking love mecha anime.
Corollary 1:
Otaku resort to anime and computer games for the sake of wish-fulfillment.

Computer games and anime serve as wish-fulfillment for these otaku because of course they can't have bitches and guns of their own. Mecha anime, in particular, hold a special function for otaku because not only do they have guns, but big fucking guns and fighting robots.

Naturally, a few works of fiction have addressed this trend, to varying degrees of success.

Before diving in to Muv-Luv's commentary, I will ground you with a more mainstream anime response to the otaku trend: Neon Genesis Evangelion.

Part 2: Evangelion vs the Otaku

You all know what this show is. I'm too lazy at the moment to go over a plot synopsis, but the idea is that a wimpy teenager is forced to pilot a giant robot to save humanity against alien intruders.

What's most important here is the main character, Shinji Ikari, and his function in the narrative as a whole.

Shinji is cowardly, weak, and unable to function socially around women. He is completely emotionally incapable of performing the tasks set out before him by his environment and routinely shuts down when confronted with adversity.

Shinji is the otaku caricature.

Shinji, and Evangelion as a whole, are an answer to the question, "what would I do if I was allowed to pilot a giant robot?"

It's quite easy to say, as viewers, what we would do if we were in the pilot's seat in a giant mech, but Evangelion provides a realistic account of how the otaku caricature would function in this genre.

The otaku is fundamentally ill-equipped to deal with this scenario.

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One problem that people tend to have with this show is, unsurprisingly, the protagonist. He is a bitch and thoroughly unlikable. He is, in my opinion, a very accurate caricature of the target audience, but that actually kinda works against the show as a whole. We reject Shinji because he is not the kind of character we typically project ourselves onto in mecha shows. Thus, the show's message falls on deaf ears (at least to the part of the core otaku audience).

^ Regarding this point, I am not suggesting that Evangelion is a commercial failure, because it's not, but this is a description of a common response to the show to those that are not "in the know."

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Muv-Luv addresses the same otaku phenomenon, but it takes a subtly different approach and arrives at a different conclusion.

Part 3: Muv-Luv vs the Otaku

The "Fantasy World"

Takeru Shirogane, the protagonist of the Muv-Luv series, the kind of person we all wanna be. He has not one, but two childhood friend waifus who clamor over the dick for no reason beyond the fact that it literally exists in their general proximity. He's smart, but he's a bit of a slacker. He's a nice guy with a bit of a rough edge. He's good at videogames and everyone just gravitates towards him because he's the main character.

Takeru is the otaku ideal, the person the otaku audience wishes they were. His desirable traits make him perfect for self-projection. He has no particular depth beyond what you might expect from a generic harem eroge.

Takeru is a strong tether for the kind of wish-fulfillment masturbatory fantasy that Muv-Luv Extra describes. Muv-Luv Extra is a fantasy world.

The author knows this and exploits this to its fullest potential.

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You might think, then, that the post-apocalyptic hellhole described by Unlimited is "the real world". Well, not exactly.

Despite what most people think, Unlimited is very similar to Extra, just in a different setting.

The bitches still want his dick.
He's still remarkably attractive to everyone around him.
He's not only a good pilot, but the best pilot everyone's ever seen, and the only reason he's the best is because he played a lot of video games.

Takeru, the otaku ideal, is fucking amazing in this sci-fi/military/mecha scenario. He never really has to dramatically change himself in order to fit in.

Unlimited is still the fantasy world. This is still wish-fulfillment for its audience. This time, instead of a romance fantasy, it's a mecha fantasy.

And, after spending upwards of 30 hours living vicariously through Takeru, we "become" Takeru.

...but this world isn't really realistic, is it?

The "Real World"

Hey fam, remember all those desirable traits Takeru had and how awesome it was to live through these cool scenarios in his shoes?

Fuck you.

Fuck you for liking Takeru. Fuck you for thinking that Takeru was the kind of person that is actually desirable in society. Fuck you for thinking that Takeru could save the world.

Fuck you.

Muv-Luv Alternative is like the incontinent pet mastiff that just can't stop shitting diarrhea chunks over the carpet of your brain.

To give you an idea of what Alternative is like, Attack on Titan is a fanfiction of it. Admitted by Isayama himself.

I won't go too deep into spoiler territory, but the idea is that all of these things that Takeru, the otaku ideal, is good at don't actually fucking matter in the real world.

Bitches? Guns? Fuck you, that doesn't really matter.

What actually matters? Empathy for others, mental fortitude (a FUCKTON of mental fortitude), courage, and strength of character, for starters. Takeru initially possesses none of these things and is fucking FLATTENED by the events that unfold. (There's literally a story arc about PTSD)

We otaku are not prepared for the real world.

Alternative makes us question what characteristics we, the audience, should actually value.

Muv-Luv Extra and Muv-Luv Unlimited are both the kinds of wish-fulfillment escapist fantasies that Muv-Luv Alternative criticizes at a core level.

The series as a whole works because of how it forces us to invest in Takeru, and how it routinely tears him down when it actually matters. We are on a journey with him, we like him, but we realize that we need to change in order to survive in the real world. Takeru's charm and likability are not sufficient ideals to live for in this world.

This is what I mean by Muv-Luv Alternative serving as an anti-escapist fantasy.

We projected ourselves onto Takeru, the otaku ideal, and were punished for it. At the same time, we are forced to mentally adapt with Takeru, or die.

Alternative is optimistic, though, and shows us that the world isn't purely a shitsack of terror. With enough effort, willpower, and courage, we can change ourselves into heroes, heroes that can actually save the world.

We grow alongside Takeru because of the tether established in Extra and Unlimited. Takeru is us, and if Takeru can adapt in this hellhole, maybe we can too.

But we have to work for it.

"Milk Bound" Anal(ysis)

Game: Milk Bound
By: Sponge Teitoku (すぽんじ帝国)

Completion:
2/3 endings unlocked (Endings A and B)

Acknowledgements

Thank you to user mellonxcollie for the recommendation! I'm seriously curious how you came across this game. (Only 8 Westerners have purchased this game ever...)
---
I understood fuck-all about this game, because it was in Japanese. However, with the help of user evanescence_death4ever and Visual Novel Reader, I was able to piece parts of it together. Thank you eva!

Synopsis

The player stars as Yousuke (Yo-kun), a kid who lives with his parents in an apartment complex. However, it is Golden Week, so his parents are out of town. He is visited by his neighbor, Midori-san, whose husband is also out of town for Golden Week.

They're both lonely and decide to keep each other company. (That's a euphemism for "they fucked a lot.")

Assorted Thoughts

The Developers

Sponge Teitoku is a doujin circle with, as far as I know, three other games. I was going to check them out and apply similar treatment to them, but they seem kind of rape-y, so I'm gonna stay away.

Unfortunately, Sponge Teitoku does not seem to be in business, which is a shame. Not because this game is actually good, but because I strongly support doujin/indie development endeavors. Rest in peace, すぽんじ帝国.

Game Design

One playthrough takes around 2-3 hours of reading, without skipping text. If you fast-forward, one playthrough takes around 3-4 minutes.

There are around 6-9 choices, each with 2-3 options.

As you probably have reasoned thus far, this game contains three endings. I am not totally sure what leads to each ending, but here is what I gleaned about the structure of the game:

* There are choices which have "local consequences": that is, choices which diverge only to provide different H-scenes, but do not have long-term consequences. For example, one of the last choices contains two options: the first option results in a blowjob H-scene, whereas the second option results in a reverse cowgirl H-scene.
* There are choices which do not have short-term consequences, but result in different scenes playing in the long run. For example, if you choose to hold Midori-san's hand during the movie at the beginning, she asks you if you love her towards the end of the game.
* The third ending, Ending C, is extremely difficult to find. I was unable to reach it after several dozen attempts. (I called this the "Steins;Gate" ending --- perfectly straddling the A and B attractor fields)

Three endings gives a bit of variation, but it's not immediately clear to me what choices affect what outcomes. (That is, I don't know what choices lead to Endings A, B, or C). This reduces my sense of agency over the game. However, I am not in a position to criticize the game over this point, since it might have made more sense if I was able to read Japanese.

Regarding reading and config settings, it's pretty par for the course: you can adjust voice, sound effect, and BGM sound settings; you can adjust the text appear speed. One feature which I appreciated, and one which is often missing in doujin games, is the ability to fast-forward through previously read text. This feature is important for games with divergent narratives, since it lets the player know when their choices have resulted in different outcomes, while skipping every scene they have previously seen.

(For example, if I perform one playthrough and then perform an identical playthrough and fast-forward, I skip through the entire game. If I perform one playthrough where I make one different choice, and that choice results in a different scene, the fast-forward stops, indicating that my choice actually mattered.)

Like all eroges, this game contains a CG gallery, so you can walk through memory lane and reminisce about all the different times Midori-san gave you a blowjob.

One thing I appreciated(?) was the option to revisit previously viewed H-scenes from the main menu. I'm not sure if this is a common feature, but it will surely resonate with nukige fans.

So, regarding game design, Milk Bound generally hits all the right notes for an indie eroge production.

Art

Well, Midori-san has huge tits.

It's important to note that while Midori-san actually is a MILF, she is not drawn like a MILF. Instead, she's drawn like an onee-san, which provides a different feeling for the game. (Whether or not that's a good thing depends on your boner type.)

Characters

I can't tell you anything about the protagonist besides the fact that he doesn't know what beef stroganoff is.

Midori-san seems to have the amount of complexity required for a heroine of a cheating game, so I can't really complain. Her husband is away, and she's horny lonely. She seems to have a kind of cute personality though. (I can only partially tell because, you know, I can't totally understand what she's saying.)

The relationship between them is kind of charming, which is not something I would normally expect from a game like this. I can't quite place my finger on it, but I could imagine almost liking this game if the characters were placed in a different scenario.

Sound

The BGM and sound design of this game is pretty standard for a low-budget eroge, except for a few startling exceptions.

The song that plays during the H-scenes feels really... sad and depressing. If that is intentional, kudos to the developers --- I felt it. (This could potentially be intentional, considering that Midori-san is literally cheating on her husband this entire time. It serves well to inspire cognitive dissonance: it's fucking awesome that she's blowing me, but is this really right?)

I don't think it was intentional though.

The other significant scene is where Midori-san gives you a blowjob while Greensleeves (yes, that Greensleeves) plays in the background. Even further, this song actually plays within the storyworld of the game itself, so she is literally giving head while listening to fucking Christmas music.

It's one of the most memorable blowjob scenes I've ever seen. Fucking kudos, Sponge Teitoku.

---

Now, let us turn to the character voices.

Only Midori-san is voiced, which is customary for eroges (that is, the protagonist is usually not voiced).

I don't really know what to say besides she pulls off the onee-san role pretty well. And she put her, uh, all into the H-scene voicing.

Let us discuss the H-scene voice acting.

JESUS FUCK, is she into it. She fucks like a madman. I want to give particular attention to her blowjob acting.

It's revolutionary. It's paradigm-shifting. It's transcendental.

"Slurp slurp, slurp slurp."
--Midori-san, 2008

Midori-san slurps like a starving African child at a watering hole.

This actually raised my standards for what a blowjob could be. If I'm ever being slurped on without vacuum-cleaner-like energy, I will be sorely disappointed.

Conclusions

This game is exactly what you think it is.

If you want a quick fap, go for it, but otherwise this game is not going to be leaving any real lasting impression on you.

Verdict

Pants-off rating: 7/10
Pants-on rating: 3.5/10

ErogeQuest 2016 Part II: More C's Ware (Desire)

ErogeQuest 2016 continues! This time, I read through Desire by C's Ware.

All in all it was pretty damn good, this is more like the YU-NO I love.

Playthrough notes here: (Spoilers for Desire and YU-NO)

Desire. notes

~started Al's route~ this motherfucker literally has his name embroidered on his shirt lmao

he's into spanking, huh

Kanno's games tend to have a kind of comical tone to them when the player does something stupid, but seeing the protagonist's face contort to match that is kind of unsettling...

"What a little schoolgirl! A guy who does embroidery?"

"Don't be so sexist. A guy can do embroidery, too, if he wants."

ok it's weird that the "face changes" aren't represented on the actual center sprite, but rather in a box on the bottom right corner.
I'll accept that it's one of the first games to even HAVE face changes, and maybe technical limitations prevent storing multiple full-body sprites, but it's still offputting

seems to be the first plot-driven story from C's Ware

"What exactly are you trying to accomplish by opening your fly?"

"She's working so hard, it's almost as if her life depends on it!" (hmmmm)

oh sexy time with Christie
OH MAN IT'S KYLE
OH MAN IT'S ME NOW

THEY'RE MAKING POETRY WILL THEY FUCK LMAO

"Further I rammed towards reaching the bang, my hard prick pulsing inside the poontang"

"Like a priest does his bible when preaching at mass, I used both hands to grab her plump ass"

"Her tight quivering anus caused me to chuckle... so I slid in my finger right down to the knuckle"

Al is giving Sylvia shit for wanting to be more masculine, hmm....

"Women with a beauty like yours should express it to the fullest extent" wow

"Even if I don't want to be feminine?"

"Yes, because I really dig you." WOW

Jesus Christ he's such a fucking asshole to Sylvia -- there's no way this isn't going to end in an h-scene
WOW! I was wrong on that one, he just left

Makoto and Kyle together, I'm sure this is the appearance of the "compulsory sex" plot device

OH CHRIST, WHY IS SHE NAKED

Sheryl is the fucking best, such a bro

"Don't you read English subtitles? I told you that area is off-limits!"

ooooh the seawater is off-limits huh???

I'm glad Reiko is giving Al shit for cheating on his girlfriend

I've been switching between the PC-98 and Windows images, definitely digging the Windows images surprisingly. Just not a fan of the character designs in the PC-98 version (besides Sylvia and Sheryl)

I just noticed the sign in the building says "LABOLATORY" lol

It's still weird seeing the PC-98 images on top of the Windows interface... like how the outdoors images are in monochrome but the island map (from the Win version) is hi-res

Bio-chemical warfare + dead heroine found with chemicals in her body... is this Love Potion all over again???????

also it's kind of annoying that the music resets whenever you change location

I kinda like Kazumi's character

this game is leagues better than everything that came before it from C's Ware, they're actually talking about their feelings!!!

and there are semblances of character arcs!

Sheryl's h-scene was really awkward

#freeAl

ayy Sheryl x Sylvia catfight

HER EYES OPENED
HOLY SHIT REIKO'S EYES OPENED
SHE'S NOT DEAD???? not gonna lie that freaked me the fuck out

Al and Tina are totally alone on the island now and are living off the land... this is starting to remind me of the ending of YU-NO

What the fuck is happening???

HIS FACE IS MELTING AAAA
SHE KICKED HIM THROUGH TEH CHEST

~finished Al's route~
that was pretty fuckin good, not gonna lie
I'm getting strong YU-NO vibes here:
Man and daughter figure stuck in an area outside time, daughter sacrifices herself to save father, whole point of story is to get them reunited (or something like that)


~started Makoto's route~

she's touching herself to him, great

but I'm liking the two perspectives deal here, especially for a mystery story like this --- instead of forcing you to reread stuff to pick up on hints you missed, you get the same scenario from another perspective

I'm going to try to evaluate Makoto's route based on BOTH as an entry route and as a secondary route --- the player is allowed to start with either Al's or Makoto's route, so I want to see how the quality of the experience would change if I picked Makoto's first

the female doctor/nurse characters are always sketchy as fuck in these games, but not here for some reason --- the male doctor is bad tho

LMAO Makoto called the kid a little whore
"What's a whore?"
"(You little shithead...)"

there's a blatant double standard here --- Al's motivation is to uncover the truth, but all Makoto wants to do is fuck Al

there are also way fewer choices in Makoto's route than in Al's... in Al's route you had to investigate each item individually, with Makoto you only investigate a scene at a time. Narratively it makes sense - Al is a newcomer and also a reporter, while Makoto has no reason to inspect everything since she's been here for a long time. But I can't help feeling that Makoto's route is an afterthought compared to Al's

"She'd continue with her research even if James Bond had his prick up her ass"
Never change, translators

oh shit, Reiko and Makoto were fucking each other?
and they are now, great

OH NO, MAKOTO OVERHEARD THE RHYME FUCKING

grr Makoto's first h-scene...
#makotoDidNothingWrong
err wait I just realized that Makoto cheated on Al before she found out he was cheating on her, but I still feel sympathetic to her --- if you read both AlxChristie and ReikoxMakoto's scenes again, neither of them are really consentual... and KylexMakoto CERTAINLY isn't

oh great, blackmail now

god fucking damn it

I hate this route so much

I fucking hate this route so much

I want it to end

Is Martina really trying to say that "even if your partner cheats on you, you should trust in him because he still loves you?"

NEVERMIND, the nurse is off her fucking rocker too

i hate this route so fucking much, i can't even put it into words why

this makes me so fucking mad

the girl's route exists so the protag can be repeatedly raped and felt sorry for
this is bullshit

why can't this game treat Makoto with dignity?

~Makoto end~

this route was really kinda awful in its treatment of its protag
the ending was alright, but I can't look past the fact that Makoto fell in love with her rapist

anyway a new route opened up, maybe it's faster

~martina route start~

martina's pretty fuckin cool, not gonna lie

is she trying to revive / clone her dead daughter or something?

or maybe transport to another dimension where her daughter is still alive?

she's pretty fixated on this notion of "destiny" （運命）

Martina is the closest to a real human being in this story lol

man this is a pretty good route so far, digging the Tina and Martina dynamic

Tina's gonna be reborn?

WHAT THE FUCK IS THERE A TIME LOOP????

SHE's TINA????????

holy shit wow, you got me, game

~end of game and epilogue~

damn, that was pretty good

but we absolutely did not need Makoto's route in there at all. it did nothing for this game. It was a cool idea, but I hope it was done better in Eve ~Burst Error~.

This game is definitely a spiritual predecessor to YU-NO, though, like holy shit lmao.

So yeah. 7/10 probably. Next up is Eve ~Burst Error~!